Friday, September 17, 2010

Olivia Lea Barry (part 1)

    So this is how its going to go down; considering I just gave birth my mind is all over the place. I had heard that your knowledge level drops once you have a baby. Not permanently but that everything is kinda mush mentally (and physically). Which is true I've hard a difficult time even reading 3 sentences because my brain is not wanting to comprehend anything. Because of that im not going to write down the whole 9 yards story in one post (this is also for your sake so hopefully I dont steal hours of your day), so im going to spread them out. I may even write 2 a day or whenever I think of something good to write about. I hope you all can follow along. Feel free to ask questions in the comments and ill write about them. I know this is sort of selfish but I really dont feel like telling everyone the story a billion times which is why Im sending you all to my blog to read about it.
40 weeks and 4 days this is actually what i was wearing when arriving at the hospital
       Lets see where to start? Thursday Sept 9 I told my mom we needed to go to the store to get a tight sports bra (since im obviously not breastfeeding) because I felt like it was coming soon. Especially since I was 4 days past my due date (which I had no problem complaining about, but now feel stupid for complaining). Later that day I went to the Dr.s where he told me my cervix was still shut and nothing was happening, so my hopes of delivering soon went down the drain pretty quickly, but I still hoped it would be soon. While hoping I did not imagine that Friday Sept 10 I would wake up to a contraction. I had been having some Wed and Thur but that was the first time so I figured they were Braxton Hicks contractions. But while sitting awake in bed as I got another contraction about every 15 min or so I started to realize that this actually might be it, yet still completely skeptical. Come 3am my Dad woke up walked by and asked what I was doing, I simply responded that I was packing (I had a bag all packed 3 weeks before I was due, but practically unpacked the whole thing because all the comfy clothes were in there, so i had to repack), luckily I had written out a list of things I still needed to pack, and of course my Dad didnt think twice about me packing.
     It was so difficult to tell if I was really in labor because with everything I had read false contractions, were practically the same as real contractions. Besides the fact the never having contractions before I did not know if they were contractions or my body messing with me. They were consistently irregular! I would have 3 in 5 min that didnt grow in intensity, or only 2 in 10 min that would get worse, and the darn book said to go into the hospital when your physician told you (i.e. once contractions are every 5 min or 3 min), too bad my Dr. didnt tell me anything since he didnt think the baby was coming anytime soon. So 445am comes along and my Dad gets up to get my brother up for seminary (yes he has early morning seminary because of band, i think hes insane) and I quietly "yelled" down the hall "DAD" (i felt like a little child again because i was too lazy/in pain to get out of bed) he came back and I asked him to get my mom (he said it took him a few seconds to realize why I was asking for mom in the middle of the night), who very quickly came into my room, so I nonchalantly asked what contractions felt like. 3 and a half hours later we were on to the hospital. I kept saying and thinking if they tell me Im not in labor, I will refuse to leave the hospital until I deliver this baby.
     Luckily once they finally checked me I was dilated 4cm! by 945 I was in my delivery room hanging out. My nurse came in and told me that the anesthesiologist was on his way. My Dr. (luckily is also LDS and is very understanding of the situation) had been at the hospital all night (he was the on call "no doc" doctor that night, and said that today was the busiest he had seen it in 13 years) and was there when I was walking to my room and he called for the anesthesiologist for me, since I had asked how early I could get one at a previous appointment. By 1045 I was all drugged up, dilated to 5cm and the Dr. broke my water.  
     To me it seemed like only an hour later, but it was probably 2-2 and half hours later the nurse came in and reprimanded me for not moving around. I just stayed on my back the whole time and she wanted me to be moving from side to side(she was actually a very funny lady and told me that she enjoyed potato chips and beer, I had to hold back my laughter when she said that). So she checked me said "well looks like youre going to have a baby", my initial thought "NO DUH!", but before what she said really registered a huge rush of emotions came over me and yes I wanted to cry. So when my mom came back in she thought I was crying so she started crying which tipped me over the edge and I really started crying and just pointed towards the door for her to leave. Not because I was mad but because a rush of adrenaline had set in and having my Mom there just made the emotions that much worse. So I "labored down" (dont ask me what that means because all I did was sit there for about 30 more min before pushing). So started the whole pushing process, and at one point the nurse said to another nurse "you need to go get the Dr. from the hall, or im going to be delivering this baby" Dr. walks in 3 contractions later Livvys born. So total 45 min of pushing which honestly it all went by way quicker than it really was(i wonder if it goes by that quickly for the nurses too because theyre busy or if its a drag because they do the same thing everyday?) So 3:24 September 10th 2010 Olivia Lea Barry was born, 7lbs 12oz 21inches long and gorgeous and perfect.
 I realize it was my baby(and Vaughn and Amy's) so me saying she was perfect is completely biased, but she really was. On the next few posts Ill have to share some of my favorite little quirks she already had that I just fell in love with. Dont get mad at me for saying this all you mothers out there, but delivery was honestly a thousand times easier than I ever expected. Yes I had an epidural and have no idea how women out there have natural births (I think I wouldve been cursing at the world if I had a natural birth), because even with the epidural towards the end I could feel some of my contractions that hurt like the early contractions which means they were way intense. I am swearing by epidurals and will gladly bring on the next one for my next pregnancy (please dont think that I am bashing any of you who have had natural births I actually gained a great deal of respect for you, I may still not understand your reasoning's, but the fact that you're willing to go through that much pain for your child is absolutely incredible and you have me beat in every area).
       Well I knew some of these posts would be long, because trying to condense 13 hours of labor into a few simple paragraphs is a bit difficult. I tried to leave out the super gory details in case a male happens to read this, but I have to problem letting you know the gory details if you want to know HAHAHA! And also I am doing well because I know youre all wondering. I am almost better now than I was 7 months ago. I dunno just happier, which is weird because Livvy isnt with me anymore, but I know that shes with her mom and grandparents right now sleeping, opening her big eyes, and getting cooed over which is comforting to think about. Ill write more about the adoption and my thoughts and feelings later, I might surprise a few of you!
     Thanks for all the love and support each and every one of you have given me. I know you have all been praying for me, because this process wouldnt have gone so smoothly without those thoughts and prayers. So a huge thank you, I truly feel completely indebted to the many people who have reached out. Just those tender mercies that are so easy to look past, a million thank yous. I cant even say it enough to express my gratitude. THANKS!


  1. oh my sweet sweet friend. You are amazing, just Amazing. I can only imagine all the emotions you are feeling right now, but know that we love you and can hardly wait to see you again! Call me sometime and lets chat!

  2. You are amazing! I don't think you are bias, just correct. She is perfect.

  3. What a cutie, Berlin you are amazing and I am so glad to have you as my cousin! many hugs!!

  4. Berlin, I look up to you in SO many ways. Way to go being so brave! She looks beautiful. I'm so proud of you and am so honored to call you my friend. :) you are incredible!